« Texas Tops In Hunting and Fishing; Where Does Your State Rank? | Main | Brit Hunting Ban Backfires »

December 28, 2007

This page has been moved to http://www.fieldandstream.com/blogs/field-notes

If your browser doesn’t redirect you to the new location, please visit The Field Notes at its new location: www.fieldandstream.com/blogs/field-notes.

Discussion Topic: On Anti-Hunting Girlfriends

So guys, you got any advice for this poor fella:

From the syndicated advice column “Ask Amy,” as seen in the Chicago Tribune:

Dear Amy: My girlfriend and I have been together for two years. This month she gave me an ultimatum: I give up hunting, or she leaves.

Every year, my best friend and I spend the opening weekend of deer season in a cabin we built on his family's land. It is the only weekend I hunt, and I look forward to it every year. . . .

My girlfriend told me this year that she doesn't want to be with someone who could kill a deer. I tried to explain that hunting helps control deer population[s] . . . [and] is a better way of acquiring meat than buying beef slaughtered in an industrial farm and shipped across the country.

I went hunting this year against her wishes and killed a buck. She wouldn't talk to me for three days. Now she says if I don't promise to give up the sport, she will leave me. . . .

What should I do?

-- Befuddled in Binghamton

Check out the full story and tell us what you think.



A person should never issue an ultimatum unless you are willing to accept the results.


A person who's is comfortable trying to run your life in this aspect, will have no trouble trying to run your life in every way.

Grow a pair, walk away and find yourself a person who loves you for you.



"What should I do?"

Be a man. Go hunting...for another woman.

This is why you date before you commit to a relationship. I assure you that a woman who objects to a man's hunting will most likely object to many other things about that man and what he believes.

If she doesn't like hunting, then she will not like your hunting friends. Tell us, what else has she already convinced you to stop doing or change about yourself?

Or...give up hunting and let her continue to emasculate you, bit by bit, until you are a spent shell - an empty husk. Dry and bitter.

Go hunting.


In a real partnership, you encourage and support your partner in his or her passions. Sorry you don't have that in your current relation. Time to move on.


I just broke off a 3 year relationship because my ex always gave me trouble when i would hunt late or hunt on days that she wanted to do something, no women gets in the way of my passion, ever

Matt Mallery

I agree with all of the above and add:

Dump her now!

Mc. Squizzy

Some people just don't understand! Circle of Life people!! It is really a good thing to go hunting and fishing for multiple reasons. I also agree with Jack, "Go hunting... for another woman!" She needs to love you for who youu are damn it!

r napolitano

Love has no conditons or ultimata, she wants to run your life now and forever. Tell her to hit the trail and good riddance, counting your blessings as the steps she takes to walk away.

Bryce Barrette

stick to your guns keep your hunting tradisons alive but if that means loseing your gril friend will so be it. its a small price to pay but it will be worth it . then try to find your self a woman who enjoys hunting or at least tolaerts it


Boy, if he's got to ask this question, he's already in trouble.
This is something my spouse and I discussed long before either of us even thought of saying "I do!", and is a subject that should be breached early in any relationship.
I would tell him to continue hunting, if she leaves him, it will have been "her" decision, not his!



I'd have to agree with the other guys here - the answer is plain and simple - go hunting. And again, if he's asking some babe in a newspaper advice column, he's really in trouble.....

John R

She sounds like trouble to me, and I mean trouble in the sense of an incompatibility issue. Find another mate that likes hunting or at the least is supportive.


It just dawned on me. I don't know a single self-respecting gun-owner or hunter who would write a letter like this to an advice columnist. Any wagers that the author of the "Dear Amy" letter is some anti-hunter girlfriend? This is probably the work of some treacherous little tart trying to choke the spirit out of a man and turn him into a compliant, pliable lump.

I can hear it now: "See honey, Dear Amy sez maybe this man should stop hunting."

Treachery, indeed.

Jose Hemanda

He should tell her to take a hike, but be sure she doesn't take that jar with her. You know, the one with his testicles in it.

I just moved in with my fiancee and our 10 month old and it seemed like every Friday she would start blowing hot air in an attempt to kill my enthusiasm for the Saturday hunting I had been looking forward to all week. If it was not for the baby I surely would have told her to take a hike. Once I realized there was a trend we had a good talk and I've had a great hunting season since.

Brucie Boy

Man does this make me appreciate my wife even more. Although she doesn't hunt (or even shoot) she has never stood in the way of my hunting or fishing. I think the hunter/gatherer thing appeals to her. And I don't give her any grief about shopping; what's fair is fair. There are only 2 words of advice this boy needs: GET OUT!


My father gave me a book recently that might help explain why Men need to hunt and experience adventure.
It’s called. "Wild At Heart" by John Eldrege It is a fantastic read.


While I don't have any sympathy for the girlfriend in this instance, there are other instances in which such an ultimatium might be acceptable.

I have a cousin who behaved like a complete embecile about hunting. He would quit his job the first week of October every year, he would buy guns and gear instead of buying his kids clothes, and on an on.

His wife gave him a similar ultamatium, and after he ignored her she took off. I can't say as I blame her.


I have to say that for many years my wife had a problem with gun ownership. After many years of explaining to her the benifits of owning and learning to shoot weapons she finally came around to some right thinking and now she likes to shoot and wants her own pistol.
Sometimes it just takes a little time to lead women to the water then they will drink on their own.
Next we are going to get cc permits!
Gotta love her!!!


My girl doesnt hunt , she fishes. Due to an injury I couldnt hunt last year. This year was iffy but she did everything possible to help me get out there. If it wasnt for her I couldnt have done it, One in a million and i got her!

This guy only hunts once a year? He might as well give it up. He barely hunts enough to be considered a "hunter" in my book.


Got my wife a pistol shortly after I got myself one and we got permits together. No grief from her about hunting or shooting. She doesn't like to hunt but now at least loves to shoot. Maybe that guy should try to talk her into target shooting first if he doesn't really want to get rid of her... yet.

Trae B.

okay the person two post above me dont seem like much of a hunter to me.hunting aint about going out every single day.Its about going out with friends enjoying the woods.If you enjoy the sport then your a hunter in my book.


Well said!
I honestly can't imagine anyone staying in a relationship where one party gave ultimatums, unless it involved something illegal (drugs). But hunting? If hunting bothered someone, why did they ever date in the first place? Also, wouldn't that type of person enjoy the organically grown meat? I would have forgotten her name by now!


If this guy has been with this girlfriend for two years and this is the first Redflag he has seen, something seems wrong here to me. If it were me, I wouldn't give her a second thought, I'd buy her a bus ticket out of town. My step dad made my mother wait 6 mos. to get married, he said "We'll get married after Duck Season is over". I always thought that was a good attitude.


Dude...you hit the lottery...you get to dump her on HER own terms!! Plenty of fish in the sea, go get anothern. I'm sure you've been eyeing a few of her friends for a while now anyway...

Our Blogs