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Give Hillary a Medal
WANTED: CREATIVE THINKING
You are all no doubt familiar with Hillary Clinton's discredited claim that she embarked at the Tuzla Air Base under sniper fire and had to run for it. I believe this points out the need for a medal for public persons who claim to have been in danger, and weren't. But we need a name for this decoration.
An example: Some months ago there was a contest to name the Clinton's house in Chappaqua. The winner was, I believe, "Disgraceland." Now we need you all to kick the dung heaps of your minds and see what slithers out. I will pick a winner, if there is one, and accord him great glory on this very blog.
HEY!!! DR. RALPH!!!!
I REPRESENT THAT REMARK!!!!!
I NEVER, AS I UNDERSTAND THE TERM, "STAINED A DRESS"!
Tonight's news stated that HRC "mis-spoke!"!
How about a "Mis-Spoken Token"
Bubba (and I don't miss!)LMAO!!!!
Posted by: Bubba | March 27, 2008 at 06:48 PM
Now look what you statred DAVE, we'll have a Mexican President and the crow will be our National Emblem...
Posted by: | March 27, 2008 at 07:29 PM
The medal will be constructed as follows: A yellow ribbon, beneath which hangs a bronze eagle with only one wing- the right one. This represents a vast right-wing conspiracy. The eagle will be clutching in its right claw a scroll. You can't read it on the medal, but it represents a pardon. The left claw is grasping a crossed camera and microphone to represent the ever-critical photo-op and sound bite. The medal can only be awarded by Congress, as only Congress can fully grasp the power of prevarication. We shall call it the Congressional Medal of Political Expediency, and the honorees shall forever be barred from burial in Arlington Memorial.
Posted by: LowRecoil | March 27, 2008 at 08:07 PM
I would probably be way more into politics if I could understand all the big words they use.
Posted by: Trae B. | March 27, 2008 at 08:57 PM
It should be a round pendant hanging from a black ribbon, on which, in bas-relief, appears the south end of a northbound jackass, with severely visible testicles protruding through the hair of the tail.
Call it the Order of the Ass.
Posted by: anonymous | March 27, 2008 at 10:19 PM
Obviously you're referring to the coveted
Houdini Cross for Disappearance in Action
Ah, the Houdini Cross!
Posted by: El-Wazir | March 27, 2008 at 10:51 PM
How about:
"The I Learned How To Lie Poorly From My Poorly Lying, Cheating, Husband Award"
or
"The I Am Clinton, Therefore I Lie Award"
or
"The Clinton Lying Poker Face Award"
or
"The Cubic Zirconia of Politicians Award"
or
"The Fuhghessi Politician Award"
or just
"The Fuhghessi Award"
Posted by: Scrap5000 | March 27, 2008 at 10:55 PM
Joint Services Condemnation Medal
as opposed to Commendation.
Posted by: Andrew | March 27, 2008 at 11:21 PM
Prisoner of Whore Medal
as opposed to Prisoner of War Medal.
Posted by: Andrew | March 27, 2008 at 11:23 PM
How about the "Walking Eagle" award
presented to someone who's so full of crap they can't fly?
Joe
Posted by: Joe Messinger | March 28, 2008 at 12:36 AM
We do know this, had she actually come under fire the medal would have been yellow in front, brown in rear. But the mileage she'd have gotten out of it... I dodged bullets, bill dodged the draft...
SA
Posted by: SilverArrow | March 28, 2008 at 01:20 AM
1. "Depends What the Definition of Sniper Is" award.
2. "I Did Not Have Sex With That Sniper" medal.
Posted by: Gman | March 28, 2008 at 06:33 AM
Dave, you sure know how to stir the pot.
This isn't any worse than Hillary recalling a duck hunt in Arkansas where she "stood in the icy water clutching her rifle...."
All politicians lie. This is a fact of life. However, I would place Hillary above all others in the ability to spew out untruths with a straight face. The problem with compulsive liars is when they start to believe their own bullshit. So, I think she should be awarded the ICOTWR...
IMCOMPLETELYOUTOFTOUCHWITHREALITY
medal for her impersonation of a person who is concerned with the welfare of others. Before November gets here though, Obama may take the medal from her.
Posted by: Michael | March 28, 2008 at 09:40 AM
How about someone with the stones to look her lyin' ass right in the eye and spit a little Beech Nut in her face and tell her, "You madam, are a liar".
That is the guy to give the medal to.
Posted by: WA Mtnhunter | March 28, 2008 at 02:37 PM
From SF, the BOHICA (bend over here it comes again) award with "V" device for veracity.
Fliegler
Posted by: Fliegler | March 28, 2008 at 03:44 PM
How about the "Medal of Dishonor" or the "Bad Conduct Award"
Posted by: Jeff | March 28, 2008 at 09:19 PM
THE JANE FONDA CONGRUENCY AWARD
Posted by: HECK | March 29, 2008 at 07:14 AM
Ever notice that all the women ---injected--- by slick willy seem to be a step or two behind the rest of us--could be the length of the barrel or the fit of the knee pads. might even be the hair trigger. If Hillary was running bent over----how could a sniper miss???
Posted by: retired way car rider | March 29, 2008 at 08:04 AM
In a tribute to the late, great author George MacDonald Fraser,
I would call this medal...
the Harry P. Flashman Lifetime Achievement Award for Exemplary
Absence in the Line of Fire.
I would also recommend the following:
The Order of Missing Valor
The Legion of Invisible Distinction
Posted by: El-Wazir | March 29, 2008 at 01:36 PM
How bout:
The Richard Simmons Award for Bravery or
The Purple Fart
Posted by: Josh F. | March 29, 2008 at 02:08 PM
The Fictitious Courage of a Career Politican medal.
Posted by: mike | March 29, 2008 at 03:55 PM
How about to Save our ASS as for 7+ yrs of Georgie, anyone would be a improvement. I feel sorry for her if she wins, as will take most of her time to un-do some of the doable mess Gerogie Boy left us. Savior would be a honest award. Why elect someone such as we are fighting in Iraq at present. And for Georgie I suggest Dumb Ass
Posted by: Rocky Mtn Hunter | March 29, 2008 at 06:27 PM
'ADA'
Audacious Dignitary Award. Same medal design as posted before.
Posted by: Jim in Mo. | March 29, 2008 at 07:20 PM
Fantastic. This is the woman who wants to lead our country and can't remember if she was shot at in a war zone? She may hear someone cough and think that she's under attack.
Posted by: Will Pogue | March 30, 2008 at 09:55 PM
The qualifications: "the need for a medal for public persons who claim to have been in danger, and weren't. But we need a name for this decoration"
For his esteemed service in the National Guard and other scary positions.
The George W. Bush award of Skeptical Valor.
Posted by: Scott in Ohio | March 31, 2008 at 10:16 AM