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March 30, 2006

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Hunting T-Rex?

Since the late 1940s, I’ve paid periodic visits to the T-Rex skeleton in the American Museum of Trex Natural History. T-Rex and his kin departed the earth abruptly 65 million years ago, and nothing as fearsome has been seen on the planet until October 26, 1947, when Hillary Rodham came snarling into the world.

We know comparatively little about them, but the best guess is that a big T-Rex was 40 to 50 feet long and weighed about 6 tons, the same as a good-sized African bull elephant. About their innards, and how they functioned, we know very little.

Anyway, as I stood there contemplating the last earthly remains of this critter, I wondered: If you had the chance to hunt one, where would you shoot it, and with what?

I invite your opinions.

By the way, a few years ago there was a television show on the chances of re-creating a T-Rex for real, a la Jurassic Park. No one said it couldn’t be done, just that it would take time, cost a fortune, and what the hell would you do with the beast once you created it? So this may not be idle speculation after all.

Comments

Bobby

.22 long rifle in the foot.

Mike Diehl

Phased plasma rifle in the 40gW range.

David

25mm cannon

Dave

Even if T-Rex were to reappear on the scene, hunting them would be a moot point. As soon as their exsistance was discovered they would be listed as an endangered species and, regardless of reproductive capacity or potential threat to humans or native fauna, it would take another 65 million years of studies and public hearings to de-list the beasts and seasons to be established.

Rob

.50 caliber sniper round out of a Barret rifle.

Brian Thair

Probably a .375 H&H to wreck the hip girdle would put them down. Then a couple into the engine room.

George

Let's see...as tall as a school bus...weight of an elephant...large, heavy skull with 6 inch teeth (seen them at the Museum of Natural History)and able to run...This calls for internet hunting.

To David: By God, I like the way you think. I've noticed that people named David are smarter than the usual run of mankind. DP

And Dave, too. DP

12 ga. Buckhammers to the hip then finish him off with a few through the rib cage.

Ditto

An Atlatl

Richard

I would subject the poor beast to any televised speech made by George W. Bush. The T.Rex's tiny brain would be overcome by the combination of mangled English, out of touch ideas, and general inanity. Before suffering a brain hemorrage, the T.Rex would express sheer wonder that a creature less intelligent than a T. Rex could be President of The United States.

Bird Dog

A Light Anti-tank Weapon (LAW) rocket launcher. Of course, I would aim for a headshot to minimize damaging the oh-so-tender meat, so that I could properly feed my tribe of horny and scantily clad women. I would then begin to construct the world's largest rotisserie grill.

ranger Nick

I think most of us who hunt have had that idea.

In the new "king Kong" film, the big monkey killed three with his hands and a big rock. You could use his help.

So if you are hunting "MR. T", the weapon would have to be big. the choices are out there. Head shots! Hose his nasty face with 30 cal. machine rounds like from the WW2 stinger used on IWO JIMA. May not kill him, but he would have a hard time eating you with severe toothaches. His brain pan is very small but larger than the anti-gun crowd. forget the brain target.

Now, if they run in killer pac''s, your in alot of trouble. Very little is known about there hunting habits. All spectulation for now. They were the the BAD BOYS of the earth in the past.

I suppose if you bagged one Dave, they probably taste like chicken. Chicken dinner for 1000 of your friends.

Good luck in that pursuit!

Chris

Silly people! Anyone knows there can only be one possible choice for hunting this beast. The .577 Tyrannosaur, of course!

Barrett 50 Cal Single Shot. Shoot his eyes out, then finish him off with a brick of 22 LR. I can't believe I'm writing this.

mike

Guess, I would have to use 45/70 garrett cartridges, In my Marlin Guide gun. I know sounds foolish but come, on if I was going to hunt one I would at leaset use a rifle I can shoot well.

Dave Petzal

Richard: Better watch yourself. Remember that George Bush is Our Hero because he doesn't sign anti-gun legisaltion and allowed the Bubba Clinton Gun Ban to die.

As he said, history will judge him a great president.

O Garcia

Very tricky problem. Small brain, unknown placement of innards. where to shoot? hmmm. looks like the guy who proposed a rocket (or a LAW) had a point.

Maybe 250 rounds of .30-06, fed to a Browning 1919A4, will do it for me.

but whatever I do and bring, I will make sure that the son of William H. Macy in "Jurassic Park 3" is with me. That boy survived for weeks on Isla Sorno without adult supervision, with T-Rexes and velociraptors boiling around him. Quite a feat.

And when you add that he also appeared, in another life, as Benjamin Martin's son in "The Patriot", well, that makes me feel even more confident.

popeye

um i would run in cicles untill it thouts so hard with its "brain" and then it would die.

Bill Martin

When I go fly fishing, I often like to use a very light tippet material. Usually something less than 3 pounds. In the same way, I would like to hunt the T Rex with either a .22 long rifle or a .17 rim fire. Since neither of these would likely penetrate the hide of a T rex, I would most likely hide in a tree until the unsuspecting creature passed beneath me. Then I would leap from the tree onto his back, screw the .17 into his ear and pull the trigger. The bullet would do little harm directly but the sound would startle him and he would charge over a cliff and fall to his death. As to how I would survive the fall, I think I might need a parachute. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Dan Platt

There's some hints that T-Rex had some bird-like features -- maybe a similar respiratory system as a bird? They don't work like mammals.

Its brain was about a foot long, very skinny. There's some debate about how heavy its ofactory lobe was -- was it really like a vulture? Part of the debate is that the front of the braincase in similar beasts has supportive fluid rather than brain in it. Best way to figure out where it is is to think about where the neck bones attach to the skull. This is not as easy a shot as braining an elephant, or even a dugga-boy.

I had a chance last spring to stand right under the skull in the mount at the Smithsonian. The skull was strikingly empty of bone: mostly latticework to support the business-part of the jaws, yet remain as light as possible. The brain case is a short segment at the rear of the skull at the very top of the head. You barely notice it from underneath. There have been some good articles about the biomechanics of T-rex skulls, and of the brain case of Sue, the large T-Rex purchased by the Field Museum in Chicago.

Minimum .375H&H. Any of the African DGR's, maybe an elegant double, but a good CRF with more rounds in the mag would be better. Targets: neck to bring it down, and vitals (anything through the lungs SHOULD do the job eventually). I fear I'd really, really have to study its hip to figure out what would be a good shot to break it...

Derek

i would get an elephant gun and blast em in the head about 10 times

R. Collier

Hey, some of you guys are having waaaay too much fun with this...I worry about you!

i would dig a very deep hole and around that hole i would place green peas all around it and when rex came to take a pea i would kick him in the hole




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